Worries of a Woman

I feel scared. Scared of those eyes.
They penetrate right into mine
Should I look away? Or should I stare back, pretending fearless?
For god's sake, take those shameless eyes off me.

What, now I cannot even wear knee length jeans?
Why do they make the decent piece of clothing look so disgusting?
Is it really my fault that I want to look beautiful
Or is it their filthy morals that should be blamed?

I hesitate. Unlike before.
Think hundred times before you take that stranger's help
He could be too good to be true.
Maa, is this what being independent meant?

How does it matter if I am his daughter's age
Or maybe a grand-daughter for some
Crime has no ethics, does it?
Old or young, all have the license to evil.

 Turn to the newspaper today. Now.
My bet : Every third item you read will be crime.
Not just crime, crime against women.
Rape. Harassment. Dowry. Acid. Femicide. 'Honor Killing'

Frightens me so that I be cautioned.
Makes me sit in the 'Reserved for Ladies' seat only.
Tells me that I need to reach home before 9.
Gives me enough reason to confuse restrictions with safety.

As I lay awake on my bed, there are things I never will forget
Those memories which instill fear in me,which weaken me
But think good, good will happen. So I try let it go
Like a computer, I press the delete button and wipe off those slimy memories.

After what seems like forever, sleep slowly creeps in
Yet those pictures revolve, revoking the fear in me
The silence of the dark is cut by the clock ticking loud
And the question haunts, Am I safe in my own house?